Initiater and Initiat-ee

Had been really thinking about the "initiater and initiat-ee" issue since like a gazzilion years ago...and it's perfectly true that people actually tell you that--

"Oh, it's the modern era. So, as girls we can initiate, because [oppurtunities are created by our ownselves]. If the both guy and the girl does not initiate then both of them will never be together, and they'll lose their chance to ever be together. Anyhow, there is no harm to girls initiating."

To tell the truth, I was nearly caught in that trap...but deep down I never ever beleived in such crap. If a guy can't initiate and waits for a girl to intiate then let me tell you bluntly, that guys is not worth your time and energy and your "next-half-of-your-life". Because if he does'nt have the guts to even initiate to the one he loves now, will he be a good, "brave", initiating husband then?? I seriously doubt so.

Yes, the saying that "oppurtunities are created by our ownselves" is true.....but on different growns, and if on this matter, would be for the guys and guys only. If the guy that you like does not initiate, then he's definately not the one for you, and bluntly, would you want to live with a "chicken" the rest of your life?? Think about it...and don't forget to pray too. The article below is really good...maybe it will help you understand more on this as it helped me... :D

"Sisters, all the advice from Vogue, Glamour, and Cosmopolitan that talks about going after and getting your man, all the blather about how in this day and age it is just as acceptable for you to initiate as for him, is just that—blather. Be confident and trust your feelings on this matter. Be confident that if he is the man you hope and wish him to be, he will play the man. You crackle the leaves a bit when he is in the area and let him know you are there. Then wait for him to initiate, or not. In the long run, you will be well served either way." Doing Things Right in Matters of the Heart, page 94

In their newly converted, youthful zeal, my dad and a group of his friends decided that God had called them to remain single. Dad was uninterested in the efforts of women to attract his attention. Put off by their forward manner, it was easy to think that God wasn't leading him to get married.

Until he met my mom.

When he walked into the canteen at the Christian retreat center where Mom was working for the week, she didn't try to catch his eye. Instead, she told him the canteen was closed. After pleading for a hot dog (on the grounds that he'd been serving and preaching all day and was tired and hungry) she finally relented. But to this day, Dad claims the hot dog was as cold as her demeanor. (She disputes this accusation, of course!)

My dad, who only a day before thought he would remain single, was suddenly smitten. Something in him—something that wanted to initiate, pursue, and win a woman's heart—was awakened. So he asked my mom to take a walk. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Mom used to remind my sisters and me of this story when we were tempted to try to get some guy's attention. Allow a man to win your heart, she would say. And if he doesn't want to, then why would you want him?

God created men to initiate and he created women to respond. Or, as John Ensor also puts it, "His power is in the exclamation [of love]. Yours is in the echo." When we remember this, things will work right in matters of the heart.